December 31st, 2013

It is December 31st, 2013. Last day for the year 2013.


Freshly showered and planning on heading down to the New Years Eve party in the garden room at Jesus People USA.  


I called my mom and we had a good talk, called my dad and had a good talk with his answering machine, called my sister and since the phone just rang and rang I eventually just hung up.  Her and Gary must be out somewhere. 


I should review the 2013, after all isn’t that what your supposed to do? Oh, I am also at this moment listening to Aracely Bock on iTunes.  I have only bought two of her songs off her new album “Say Your Name” and “Here I Am”.   Really loving them both.

 

So this past year has seen some  mostly uneventful times, some hectic times, some craziness, some heartbreaks, some break trough’s.  Pretty much your average life.   God has been molding me, cleansing me….actually I am all those things already I am in the process of accepting and knowing who I am in Yeshua. So hard when all my life I have been (now I’m listening to Brian S Reed – “More Love To Thee” )  hearing what a horrible person I am.


So I just had some flashbacks of exchanges between me and my dad and I started shoveling food in my face. I’m not hungry. Sigh. I still have such a very long way to go.


I’m still being rejected by people on a daily basis.  The thing is (The Calling – Wherever You Will God) most people don’t even know they are rejecting me.  Most people say I’m a like able guy that people think highly of and yet here I sit night after night all alone.  Once in a great while someone will ask me to do things, oh yeah…I know what your gonna say…I DO ask people to do things and sometimes it happens but most times I get some kind of lame excuse.


Living here at JPUSA has not changed this.  Same stuff I always have to deal with.  It’s for sure not all bad though. (FFH – Better Is One Day) I have had some amazing times, laughed until my stomach hurt, felt love like I’ve never felt before, met some wonderful people and so on. 


Next year should be pretty adventures as well.  Believe it or not but I really want to perfect a British accent. Hahahahahahaha I know…weird.  I am also going to continue to try and move to Israel.  That is my hearts desire. 


My complete and utter hearts desire is to seek the face of God with every fiber of my entire being. To live completely and utterly for God and God alone. 


I also need to get (Foreigner – Blue Monday, Blue Morning) a divorce from Paulina. She has not answered any of my emails for over two months.  I wonder what’s going on with her.  I wish she would just let me go.  She hates me so much…people say it gives her some kind of twisted pleasure to play with my head.  Like how a cat “plays” with a mouse before killing it. 


I should brush my teeth and go.  Hopefully I will do a much better job with this blog next year.


Happy New Year.


Yeshua is Lord!!!

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About jesuslovespug

“How do you pick up the threads of an old life? How do you go on, when in your heart you begin to understand there is no going back. There are some things that time can not mend. Some hurts that go too deep... that have taken hold.”
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